For some reason, I’m incredibly fired up for this Pirates/Yankees exhibition game that’s been over for like five hours now. That’s why I’m going to pseudo-blog it. Aided heavily by the fast-forward button on my DVR, I’m going to post thoughts on the game liveblog style after the jump. I won’t be doing play-by-play or anything and I’m just going to post it all at once, but in honor of the first spring training game and to commemerate the annual return of baseball to our lives, follow along for some thoughts on what we all already know is the Pirates’ 6-3 loss to the Yankees.
First Inning
- Christ, the YES Network is insufferable
- It’s the little things that I miss during the offseason. Like Andrew McCutchen being two steps faster on the basepaths than my brain expects. Every single time!
- Remember all those jerks that scoffed at the talk about how powerful Garrett Jones was during spring training last year? We sure showed them! Er, uh …
- If I talked about any of the Pirates the way these YES guys talk about Derek Jeter, I’m pretty sure a restraining order would be filed.
- These black hats with gold piping are stupid.
- As per this morning’s post, Jeff Clement does not look uncomfortable at first.
Second Inning
- Lastings Milledge really does appear to be in the Best Shape of His Life ™. Seriously, the dude looks like a truck (in the positive manner of speaking that really only applies to professional athletes).
- The first charted Ross Ohlendorf fastball of the year: 92 mph!
- Did Ohlendorf always start his motion by bringing his hands over his head?
- He K’s A-Rod with a great curve and has a nice inning. Andy LaRoche flashes some nice, easy range at third base.
Third Inning
- I know this game doesn’t count, but watching nine straight Pirate hitters make outs is sadly familiar.
- The way Brian Bass briefly pauses after the ball comes out of his glove makes it seem like he’s begging hitters to crush him.
- Wow, Akinori Iwamura has some quick hands (context: fielding a high chopper by Brett Gardner).
Fourth Inning
- OMG CARLOS GARCIA HAS RETURNED
- I am uncertain whether or not it’s been mentioned that Derek Jeter is the all-time Yankee hit leader.
Fifth Inning
- When evaluating spring training performances, never forget the crazy winds in Florida (he says after watching a Ryan Church pop-up nearly leave the park and then a hard-hit drive by Lastings Milledge float all over the place).
- First blogger test of the season: Chris Jakubauskas (from memory!). Tough, but not as difficult as Mientkiewicz or as long as Van Benschoten.
- Chris Jakubauskas is pitching in a jam with Jamie Hoffman at the plate. Now I remember why I don’t watch a ton of spring training games.
- There are a bunch of different Pirates in the field and no acknowledgment of this by the YES crew.
Sixth Inning
- The Yankees are letting pitchers work two innings today. Crazy stuff.
- Gorkys Hernandez sighting!
- I know that the first spring outing probably doesn’t mean much, but it can’t be a good feeling for Steve Jackson to give up three runs in his first outing since he’s fighting for a roster spot here.
Seventh Inning
- It is officially difficult to keep paying attention at this point.
- Jose Tabata really looks like he’s slimmed down since I last saw him in Durham and then the AFL all-star game.
- I take back what I said about Steven Jackson. At least the Bucs let him finish his inning. Jonathan Albaladejo was not so lucky. And YES misses the tying run to a commercial break.
- With a batting helmet on, it kinda looks like John Raynor has a mullet.
Eighth Inning
- Pedro Alvarez! He strikes out swinging, but man, I just like watching him swing. Being a Pirate fan is kind of pathetic, isn’t it?
- There is someone standing next to Pedro in the Pirates’ dugout with a Yankee cap on that looks like Michael Cera. I think it’s time to fastforward to Virgil Vasquez giving up the walkoff homer.
- But wait! Jean Machi is on the mound! He’s built a little like Mike Fetters. Except without the terrifying breathing ritual. Also, the gun says he just (and by “just” I mean about seven hours ago) hit 96. Dark horse for that last bullpen spot?
Ninth Inning
- Virgil Vasquez really kind of looks like Demetri Martin. Actually, I think it’s just the hair.
- Aaand there’s the homer. It doesn’t count today, but I’m sure it’ll happen again this year in a situation that will count.
