See, I’m supposed to be writing about how James McDonald turned in his second excellent start and the Pirates strung together a couple of hits at the top of their lineup in the top of the tenth to pull out another late win and continue their streak of competent looking baseball BUT THEN JOSE TABATA TRIED TO BUNT ANDREW MCCUTCHEN FROM SECOND TO THIRD WITH NOBODY OUT IN THE TENTH INNING AND ‘CUTCH GOT THROWN OUT AT THIRD AND THE INNING CRASHED AND BURNED AND CHAN HO PARK RUINED EVERYTHING AND NOW I WANT TO PUNCH SOMETHING BECAUSE HELP ME JEEBUS THIS HAS BEEN ONE AWFUL, FRUSTRATING, NIGHTMARE OF A SEASON AND THAT WAS JUST THE STUPIDEST WASTE OF AN INNING AND oh man, I need to slow down for a second.
Look: I don’t know who’s idea it was to bunt there. I assume that people will immediately blame JR and maybe he did put the bunt on. But I know that sometimes young players get the idea in their heads that it’s a good idea to give themselves up for the team and bunt runners over in key situations because they’re young players and they get overwhelmed by the scope of it all sometimes. And if that turns out to be the case I wouldn’t be so upset, except that Neil Walker went through this crazy bunting phase earlier in the season where he’d try to do things like bunt Andrew McCutchen and Jose Tabata over, even though they’re two of the fastest guys in the league. And Ronny Cedeno is the motherflipping king of bunting a runner from first to second with one out and the pitcher on deck. AND SO FOR THE LOVE OF HONUS WAGNER, JOHN RUSSELL, WHY HAVEN’T YOU INGRAINED IT IN THESE KIDS HEADS THAT THEY SHOULDN’T BE BUNTING UNLESS YOU TELL THEM TO DO IT? And if JR called for it? Well, that’s the last straw. I’ll ride the Fire JR train into the freaking ground because I can’t think of a more brainless play than taking the bat out of one of your best hitter’s hands to move one of the fastest players in baseball from second to third after a leadoff double and I can’t consciously support any manager that thinks that’s a good idea any more than I could support ripping up the Constitution of the United States and replacing it with the Code of Hammurabi.
Seriously, I’m happy the Pirates lost tonight. There’s nothing in the world that gets me more worked up then a poorly-timed bunt and this was one of the most poorly-timed bunts I can remember (which says something because I’m one of those people that thinks that 99% of all bunts are poorly timed).