The WHYGAVS Glossary: WHYGAVS terms

The White Flag- A nickname given to former Pirate mop-up reliever Ryan Vogelsong, because when he entered the game it was like throwing the white flag.

Gas can- Any reliever who, by entering the game, creates the same effect as throwing gasoline on a fire. This nickname was once used as a proper name in association with Jonah Bayliss, but is now a more abstract term. Denny Bautista is the most recent example of this.

Wreck Specs- Quite possibly the worst of all awful Pirate relievers, Franquellis Osoria. He wore funny glasses and wrecked almost every game he entered.

Malphabet, Dougie Ballgame, Mientka;lkajdsflkasjwicz, Dirty Doug, Mint-Cabbage, Obi-Wan- The greatest Pirate of all-time, the irreplaceable Doug Mientkiewicz.

Sarcasm- See: the entry on Doug Mientkiewicz

DL, He Who Must Not Be Named, Voldavemort- Actually, we don’t refer to Dave Littlefield around here with Harry Potter-like nicknames, but we probably should.

Matt Wieters- Some guy who is allegedly not good at baseball, according to He Who Must Not Be Named. I’d rather not talk about this.

Dave Kerwin- Joe Kerrigan’s alter-ego who attempted to fight Jason Kendall. Because who doesn’t want to punch a Brewer?

The Pepsi Paradox- It was once reported by John Perrotto that the Voldavemort and the Pirates’ front office at the time disliked Craig Wilson because he drank too much Pepsi

¡Romulo!- Former Pirate reliever who gave Voldavemort a cover story for his lack of Latin American scouting, thus the exclamations.

Kip Wells- **shudder** Next topic.

Pat hates (insert player name here): After spending a winter writing about why Nyjer Morgan shouldn’t start, people began to suspect that I had a deep seated hatred of Morgan, and every post thereafter was puncuated with the comment, “Pat hates Nyjmo!” This has become a trend that is no longer limited to Morgan. I am not happy about it, but I have accepted it.

Pat Lackey

About Pat Lackey

In 2005, I started a WHYGAVS instead of working on organic chemistry homework. Many years later, I've written about baseball and the Pirates for a number of sites all across the internet, but WHYGAVS is still my home. I still haven't finished that O-Chem homework, though.